It means, among other things, that when you are following mommy through the market and she pauses by the fresh, luscious-looking green grapes to select a bunch to put into her basket, you do not plop one of those succulent bites into your mouth.
Furthermore, you do not follow that action by running to catch up to mommy full-voicedly declaring (with your mouth full), "Mommy! I eanning one!"What was I to do? There was my son, proudly beaming at me and savoring a grape. And there were the store employees, pretending not to look, and wondering what I was going to do? I used the universal unspoken command mothers and children both instinctively understand. My cupped hand lowered to his sweetly chewing little chin and he dutifully spit the partially masticated, sad little grape into my hand. EEEEEWWWW! Now what am I going to do with this?!?!?
I bent towards my son and told him eating this food before we pay for it is called stealing. We don't do that. What am I going to do with this grape?
And for emphasis I added something like 'people can go to jail for stealing.' And I flicked the sad wet grape off my palm into the pristine bag of luscious-looking green grapes in my basket. Rats! Why did I do that?
I went on to explain, calmly now and addressing both children, that the grapes need to be weighed by the cashier so the store knows how much money to charge for them. Internally I was rationalizing that any grape juice lost from inside the impaled skin of the unfortunate fruit would be balanced out by the presence of his saliva all over its outside.
Of course, all this happened within the first two minutes we were in the market. For the rest of the shopping trip (perhaps 20 minutes all told) the Engineer had to walk in front of me with his hands in self control, completely folded in a praying position in front of his chest.
We must have looked to be quite a solemn procession: guilty-looking child in front, mom with grocery cart in the middle and eternally bored big sister bringing up the rear.Never, never have I so thoroughly and carefully rinsed my produce at home!
7 comments:
You have given me quite a chuckle with this one Marie! Thanks.
This was a funny one Marie. My little one used to accidentally pinch underwear, I used to rush back into the shop waving the knickers saying "it was an accident, she's only 18 months!"
This was a funny one Marie. My little one used to accidentally pinch underwear, I used to rush back into the shop waving the knickers saying "it was an accident, she's only 18 months!"
MarieN!
Funny story! We used to have the same problem with my grandma.
I have seen adults munching away on the produce! Grapes and cherries really seem to bring out the munching thief in many.
oh no, that is too freaky.
and while you were being *watched* too.
my dad (who taught us never to nick stuff) tells hilarious stories of climbing up the neighbours fruit trees in search of forbidden samples....
oh, just to clarify:
the fruit-tree-theiving happened when he was a boy lol
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